Tuesday 25 October 2016

Trying To Heal In A Toxic World

Caroline Reyes-Loughrey Photography

I haven't touched my blog in months, I was too busy keeping myself alive! The past 5 months or so have been crucial. The quest for answers continue. The search for all possibilities explored. New awakenings were gladly realised. 
My therapies are all in London, I have researched the best therapies I could find, and from this I gathered, the most experienced practitioners who specialise in these modalities and how it can treat Cancer in the UK, are all in London. It was a rigorous 5 days per week of either hyperbaric oxygen, Bowen, or vitamin infusions that I took on, which required me to face the world five times a week. It's a TOXIC world out there! I thought moving a little bit further out would help, but ,- well, only just! The commuting itself isn't so bad, it's navigating through the pollution and avoiding other environmental toxins, which is inescapable in a big city. I have stage 4 lung cancer and London surely is a challenge for everyone with a compromised set of breathers! As I step out of a treatment clinic, I survey the street where I'm headed for smokers and crowds and avoid them like the plague. When the alternative route isn't a logical walking distance for my weak legs then I just wait for clearance, which is why I always give myself plenty of time ahead.The city turns into a giant hazardous maze for me. It's unbelievably toxic, you get people who smell like they've put an entire bottle of toxic perfume on them. I used to love perfume too. Your average perfume though, contains on average 14 toxic chemicals that contain parabens, phthalates, and synthetic musks that cause hormone disruption, reproductive problems, and Cancer. However, there are safe fragrances, you can find a list at the EWG website. When the perfume is really strong, I can't breathe, I was on the tube one time, and this strong waft of perfume permeated the air, I had to move. Smokers, they are everywhere! Smoking is one health risk known to most and yet the streets of london are littered with people who resemble like walking chimneys to me. I've had to slow my pace a lot when smokers are ahead of me, sometimes though, by the time you realise there's a smoker nearby it's too late and you just smell and inhale that carcinogenic fume. It's torturous! Sometimes I come across acquaintances who are so disrespectful that they smoke in front of me, even in my own home, maybe they forget I have lung cancer, duh! I just step out of the room of course, but it's disgusting. It's a big city and of course you expect cars, trains, motorcycles, trucks, etc. I don't get why in 2016 we are still struggling with toxic fuel emissions, why can't that smoke that spew out of those things become cleaner. If I move out of london, I would still have to travel to the city for treatments so there is really no point. Healing in a toxic city presents so many challenges but right now I can't escape the maze, I leave my house every time with fingers crossed I could miraculously get through the day with the least poisons dumped on my immune system without choice. This is why we constantly have to detox. At one hyperbaric oxygen session, we got to talk about getting out and about with our compromised immune systems and we all agreed, it's very difficult to blend in with the healthy world. Disability is not always in the form of crutches and wheelchairs but unfortunately you can't wear a disabled sign on your forehead to let people know you require assistance. When I carry my portable oxygen is the only time everyone's more accommodating and considerate. I sat on a disabled seat on the bus one time, and was asked to give up my seat for an older woman, I would be breathless trying to explain that I'm disabled too and it was just one stop so I just obliged. I always carry my peppermint and frankincense essential oils, and rub it on my hands and my nose, so I smell that instead.
It's been a long and difficult year. I'm still struggling to stay stable. My recent scans showed metastasis on the lymph and breast. My foggy brain is desperately trying to keep up. My weak body yearning for a break. I now use my oxygen more often and I had to get a mobility scooter to get around. 
I know we can never really cleanse ourselves completely, the world has become too toxic, we've lost control of the air we breathe, the water we drink, the way our food is made. It takes more effort now even for the healthy to keep up. We need to be vigilant and we need to be stronger than our excuses to keep our bodies, mind, and spirit in the right frequencies.